Changes - 2005

For years now we have struggled in the church with the fact that things change, causing discomfort and often unhappiness for those who were comfortable with the way things were. Change certainly isn’t restricted to church worship.

What has struck me lately is the amount of change we have seen between the genders. It seemed to begin when I was young, with the women’s liberation movement. When the bra burning began I took a mild interest in it. Naturally, some were far more militant than others, and chose to attack anything of difference between men and women. For a time some women even wore suits and ties just like most male office workers at the time. I am so glad that this did not become a continuing trend. I celebrate the fact that God made us different, so why would we want to hide that fact?

There of course was much merit to what women were trying to achieve, such as equal pay for equal work, equal job opportunities, joining the boy scouts, respect as equal partners in society, etc. As a typical Dutch male, I was overjoyed when women wanted to pay their own way on dates, because I though my funds could then go twice as far. Unfortunately, not all women endorsed this one. Despite all the changes accomplished, and still being accomplished, women have continued to maintain their femininity, for the most part, although some females have more tattoos than you would ever see on a sailor.

Now let’s consider their male counterparts. They too have undergone changes and have tried to get more in touch with their inner self. How was this accomplished? By stepping into the female domain more and more. How? Well, let’s see…

I believe it started with earrings. This was an exclusive domain of females, at least outside of the pirate world. The first men were assumed to be gay, (a term which no longer meant that they were just jolly old sorts), but over time, this practice was accepted. The first earrings, or earing, because men only wore one, were simple small loops, but even that has changed in recent years. We won’t even talk about some of the other “jewelry” attached to the body in very unnatural ways.

I grew up going to the barber. All the guys did. We got simple haircuts that required low maintenance because guys didn’t spend a lot of time fussing about their hair. Some might say that the young men who shave their heads are like this, but I would not call all the head polishing and regular shaving to be low maintenance. Okay, there was a time when some of us had hair longer than our girlfriends, but we didn’t spend a lot of time maintaining it. Today, many of us go to a hair salon, a place a boy of my youth would only go into reluctantly to wait for his mother. Some even make appointments! No barber I knew ever took appointments. But it doesn’t stop there. Men’s hair isn’t just cut, its styled, and I don’t even want to mention some of the other things that might go on in these former female follicular places (perms, colouring, etc.).

I remember that Maurice “the Rocket” Richard was a very forward thinking man for advertising the product Grecian Formula. It was just to get some of the grey out after all!!! But now, teenage boys already start by colouring their hair. What’s next, guy’s manicure parties? I’m not even talking about those guys who want to make a statement by putting their green or purple dessert in their hair instead of their mouth. At the risk of being called racist, I don’t remember seeing naturally blond Chinese boys when I was young. And I know there is men’s make-up on the market, but I try not to think about that.

The greatest advance (?) in the redefinition of men is perhaps the cell phone. When I was young, there was an unkind expression that referred to talking on the phone like an old lady, (no offense intended to anyone), the inference being that some of our senior women of the day tended to spend many an hour chatting on the phone, a very female quality. No self righteous man would want to be described this way. Yet today, many men and boys seem to have cell phones permanently attached to their ears. They can not go anywhere without making a phone call. On the train home from work I hear a young man calling his wife almost every day to say, “Hi, I’m on the 4:20 train today”. Dah, he’s on the 4:20 train every day! Ten years ago that call would not have been necessary. At sporting events, guys are on their cell phones calling their friends who are sitting in a different section of the stadium so they can wave to each other and chat about anything but the game. Why not just organize a slumber party? And who are these people they are calling at 6:15AM on the way to work? Nobody better call me at that time!

The new trend of course is the headset so one can talk on their cell phone hands-free. I work downtown. Often I see men walking down the street talking loudly to themselves, or talking to no one in particular in a restaurant. I confess that my tendency is to keep my distance, but more often than not now I see the small earpiece at the last minute.

No, the line between men and women is getting thinner and thinner. So, what was all the fuss about women in office anyway? Soon, we won’t be able to tell the difference anyway.

There is more that can be said on this subject but I have to go. My cell is ringing. I think it is my stylist rescheduling my hair appointment.